Looking back to the past to bring entertainment into the future? Sign me right up, and inject that retro goodness into my veins. No, I'm not talking about things like when Netflix thought it would be TOTALLY RETRO to put in an 8-bit Sonic the Hedgehog reference into a show. No, I'm talking about when developers look to the past for inspiration and bring those back to the present with a ton of flair and affection. Neon Inferno may be one of the most beautiful pixel art games that I've ever seen in my life, and it shows that the children once again yearn for Contra and Metal Slug to make a return.

On the other side of the coin, however, we've got Angry Video Game Nerd 8-Bit, an adventure that pulls from classic NES action platformers, and makes it more diarrhea dogshit. No, that's not a qualm about the game itself (just wait til we get to the review for that part), but it puts James Rolfe at the head of an adventure once again, and it's a charming little romp through yesteryear. For our inaugural Glizzy Gobblin' Review Show, name subject to change, I'll be diving into both of these adventures to help get your retro fix.

‘Neon Inferno’ Would Have Had Me Mowing Lawns Every Day, Just So I Could Play It Again in the Arcade

Sometimes, a game just resonates so loudly in your soul that you would do anything to experience it again for the first time. I was lucky enough to have a chance to dive into Neon Inferno earlier this year for a different publication. And even after playing through the full game, my thoughts about the game still stand incredibly tall. Neon Inferno is a monumental achievement in the world of arcade action, filled with over-the-top explosives, gunplay, and plenty of unique features that would make Metal Slug or Contra fans squeal with delight. Motorcycle chases, big bosses, and a difficulty curve that would make even the most seasoned of arcade veterans cry, Neon Inferno is exactly what I wanted it to be. But I do wish that there was more to it.

Neon Inferno isn't a big game by any means. It offers a slight amount of variation in the way that players can take down the big bosses, culminating in a massive battle that had me sweating like a hog. Thankfully, even with only 6 stages and a runtime of roughly 2 hours, Neon Inferno offers a tremendous amount of replayability. Attempting to make it through the Arcade Mode, which is one-shot/one-kill, seems like the ultimate challenge for those eager to take it on. But varying difficulty options can make repeated playthroughs all the more easy or difficult as needed, as well.

Look at It This Way: You’d Spend More in Quarters Trying To Beat the Game Than It Costs To Buy

Looking at Neon Inferno and seeing it has a $20 price tag may sound like a tough sell, but just hear me out. Six stages doesn't sound like a lot, but the variation in these levels is utterly brilliant. One second, I'm ripping down the highway, screaming on a motorcycle while blasting enemies that are trying to take me down. The next moment, I'm inside an Opera house while some of the most detailed pixel art I've ever seen in the realm of gaming is unfolding behind me. Each stage is memorable, every boss is a challenge, and the game hits the perfect sweet spot of nostalgic bliss and new-age flair. Plus, if I had to count every time I died as a quarter lost, I would have easily spent more playing in the arcade than I would have just buying the damn thing.

Neon Inferno looks to the past for a lot of inspiration, but also pulls many new features out of thin air. Characters are incredibly well designed, and the story is interesting enough to follow. Couch co-op, paired with the pure chaos of needing to balance foreground and background shooting in a stylish, cyberpunk run-and-gun, is the perfect way to spend an afternoon. Neon Inferno is an incredible package, and one that I hope we see more of in the future. It's been quite some time since I've been enamored like this by an arcade-styled shooter, and I will be there day one for either DLC or a Neon Inferno 2.

A Killer Soundtrack, Super Mega Death Christ, and So Much More Litter ‘AVGN 8-Bit’, and It’s a Riot and a Half

If the idea of Jesus Christ, himself, adorned like a battletank is enough to get you feeling some sort of way, this may not be the game for you. Or, it could be everything you've ever asked for. I'm not too sure, but for me? Angry Video Game Nerd 8-Bit was a laugh-filled adventure, one that pushed boundaries in all of the right ways, and was just that perfect amount of frustrating to make me feel like I was back in the early '90s once again. Taking more than just a little bit of inspiration from games like Mega Man, AVGN 8-Bit is that perfect type of throwback that benefits from modern flares like live-action cutscenes, while the graphical style and soundtrack call back to a more fitting timeframe.

Oh, and as to be expected, AVGN 8-Bit has more cursing than a Witch convention. Every other fucking word that comes out of the fucking Nerd's mouth is fuck, shit, ass, piss, or a combination of all of the above. Plus, it's been properly digitized to match the soundfont of the era, which is a great touch! Powerups like the F-Bomb destroy everything on the screen, while a synthesized FUUUUUUUUCKKKKK echoes in the background. Perfection. Should be enough to earn that coveted 10/10 score, right? Well...

Sometimes, ‘AVGN 8-Bit’ Is Difficult for the Sake of Being Difficult, Especially When It Comes To Boss Weakpoints

I'm only going to say this: Festerdrome. Why, for the love of all that is HOLY, is this boss designed so poorly? Every other boss in the game is a genuine delight to fight against. But Festerdrome, on the other hand, is just a chore to fight against. Thankfully, you can leave this boss until the end, so you don't have to experience pure pain in its more primal form. I'll say this, at least: KEEP YOUR BOTTLES. You'll understand when you get there, and why this small bit of advice can save you a ton of frustration.

Outside of this boss, stages are fun to hop and bop around, and the music in AVGN 8-Bit is absolutely killer. Some wonky enemy placement can end your life quickly, but in reality, a lot of NES games had that same issue. Rather than just aping that particular trend, I do wish some parts of the game were more refined. Even if you're not the biggest AVGN fan, there's a lot to enjoy here, from 6 well-designed stages, a boss rush mode, and plenty of potty humor. If you're anything like me and have been craving a deliciously dastardly old-school platformer, this is one of the best that you'll find. Except for Festerdrome. We all hate Festerdrome.

Two Decidedly Different Experiences, but Both Pay Proper Homage to Their Genres

At the end of the day, I don't think these two retro-inspired games could be any more different. Neon Inferno is a fast-paced, balls to the wall run-and gun shooter. AVGN 8-Bit, on the other hand, probably just has a few jokes about balls spread between some stellar action platforming. Regardless of which journey you end up taking, both of these titles are incredible homages to the past, while pulling in just enough QoL features to make them feel brand new.

If you've got a friend or a partner who is ready to embark on a quest to clear your name? Neon Inferno is the one for you. If you've been craving something you haven't felt since the NES era? AVGN is calling out from the abyss of PISS. Or, just do yourself a solid and pick both of these up. You'll thank me later (at least I hope).